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Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Four important ladies in my life and my little teddy

I need to spend quite a lot on Birthday gifts every January. Started with January 1st . My dear best friend chose to steal the limelight of a new year celebration, she was born some 38 years ago on the first day of January. Thru the long good 33 years of my age, I've encountered so many wonderful souls whom I called best friend although they carry that title from various phase in my life. Presently, as a mother , a career woman and a wife, I am blessed with this beautiful creature who sees me thru thick and thin. Her phone number is my S.O.S helpline, emergency department and phsyco department. As a mother, a wife and my immediate boss, we comprehend each other very well. I never met anyone as honest and caring as she is.
On January 16, my favourite cousin was born. Gulf War took place on her birthday , what a girl. Well, what can I say, she is the little sister I never had, the one I always wanted because baby brothers were not fun to play with. She was my mannequin during our play school age where my mind was made up to be either a supermodel or a fashion designer when I grew up (jauhnya tersasar, salah naik flight), I used to apply make up on her, dressed her up. I looked forward to every school break coz that would be the time for us to go back to my old man's hometown in Penang and she will be waiting for me jovially there. Some 20 years ago, communication was not as sophisticated. I need to call the public phone near her house, praying that somebody would picked it up and informed her. And some 15 minutes later I will called back and catched up with her. (Masihkah kau ingat????). Our activity in kampung would be various as well as hillarious. She was quite devil-may-care kind of girl where she would play boy stuff with boys. But whenever her dearest town girl -ladylike cousin went back to Kampung, she had willingly sacrife her play time with her rough play mates (whom were mostly our cousins as well because our clan invaded the whole area and live closely ) and play girly stuff with me. We would travel around the village looking for henna plants where we would be a lovely doll and asked the Tuan Tanah for a ranting or two of that henna. And the makcik2 will go " Ni anak Cikgu Chan kan, yang ni anak sapa (referring to me) and she will sweetly answered "anak cikgu Din" . Then we will go back and start our episode of tumbuk menumbuk.Later pulak adengan pakai memakai. Upon having a satisfied result, we would went and 'tayang' our reddened fingers to our younger cousin who will winked with jealousy. When hunger pangs attacked we will buy 2 packets of Vit's Instant Noodle at Kedai Wa and went back to cook them secretly in her Mom's kitchen. This will took place when her Mom was at school teaching, and mine was somewhere else.It will be such a big treat to a 9 (me) and 8 (she) year old since instant noodle was a taboo in my house and my parents had instilled a notion that Makan Meggi nanti 'rambut luruh' (Matila aku kadang-kadang masak meggi kat anak ku noks bila time aku 'rajin'). Sometimes we will went for 'mee kuah' still at Kedai Wa.Some other time we will went to 'accompany' (mengacau benornya) our Aunt to 'menoreh'. At one time I was wearing a ruffled white blouse (long sleeve somemore) with black swing skirt (macam artist giteww balik kampung) and we went to follow our Aunty to 'mesin getah'. Unfortunately the rubber milk spilled all over my black skirt and I cried like a mad banshee. She scolded me saying 'Tulah nak pi menoreh getah pakai macam Saripah Aini, sapa suruh" I was saddened with that because normally I was the one yang grumpy all the way.She has a little brother (the only brother in her siblings) whom was a big bully to her sister. I was always her knight in shining armour (walaupun takut gak kat budak kecik tu). She will always packed her things and wanted to follow me home whenever they had their crisis. When we grew up, we went to the same university but we could hardly find time to be together. Nevertheless, I swear she is the only person whom has the access to all my secrets , good or bad. We had never quarelled except for this one time recently which I will regret for the rest of my life. We had tolerated all the diffences all this while but the spark ignited during a bad time for both of us. I will always love her and cherish our moments together till I die. I think this the fifth time that I owed her a birthday present since she lives sooo far away now.
January 19 the most important woman in my life, whom I owed my life to , was born. My mother, the greatest mother on earth although a little bit eccentric.I strongly feel that her eccentricity and drama-queen syndrome is hereditary as I can hear and feel myself turning into her everyday. God! She was born to be a teacher, she dedicated her life to teaching profession, always turned down the offer to teach in Famous Schools but preferred to be located in rural school. She was super strict and fierce, I thanked God she was not my teacher. However, she will still received the most gifts during Teacher's Day and her pupils of some 2o years will still send her Raya cards besides countless of reunion invitation each year. She was famous too, and I was recognized in school because I am 'her' daughter. So I got to be real careful with what I did because there will be many papparazi friends of hers who will voluntarily convey the report of my behaviour to her (although she was not a teacher in my school).I was a rebellious teenager and mom was my frequent enemy. I will do things which made her mad on purpose (adakah aku kurang kasih sayang or desperate for attention??). Micro mini short skirts (she was a daughter of a Tok Guru), double ear piercing, Madonna (or Minachi) look a like bangles were never passed her approval.But somehow God has bestowed me His love by giving me a chance to change. Maybe my parents's prayers (my dad especially) were answered during their pilgrimage as I cleared my act and made a 360 degree change my life just before SPM. Alhamdullilah. And now that I am a mother myself, I really understand my own mother. What she really meant when she said that the reasons for her to be angry with me was because she loved me. At that time I only have this formula in mind, angry = hate. When she was hospitalised for 2 weeks, I took a leave from University and took care of her in the hospital. That were the days when I really felt her love for me. Quite often during that time she will hold her nature's call to the max just because she did not want to wake me up.I love her so very much that I secretly pray that I would die before her because I could never picture life without her. She has 4 children and she will, be it Raya or not cook each and everyone favourite food.She will go a million miles to ensure our cravings or wishes come true. Despite our differences (e.g she will labelled everything in the kitchen and her cabinet, me = ada aku kisah? she will fold clothes and tie them with rubberband to avoid mess in the cupboard and that will safe her time of frequent housekeeping , in short she is very systematic, me on the otherhand will call Bibik for rescue.Mom will and is able to do everything singlehandedly , me I will and managed things perfectly with a maid in the house , in short I die without my Bibik) I am still her daughter, perfect or not, she accepted me unconditionally. Of course we have our common interest as mother and daughter to prove the saying "ke mana tumpahnya kuah kalau tak ke nasi'. We share the love for cooking and fashion.At the age of 58 years old, she still maintained her svelte figure (part ni of course la tak sama) and she still looking fabulous without fail. She is still my stylist and me her doll. She will still buy me clothes although it should be the other way around.So isnt she great?? The word 'LOVE' alone is too insufficient to describe my feelings towards her and nothing that money can buy will suffice her sacrifice in bringing me up to the person I am today (Nooo I am not making this as an excuse not buy her present) .
On this coming January 23, my little teddy, my hunny bunny, my eldest son will celebrate his 8th birthday. My first born after a year of waiting. Rahmat dan rezeki yang maha agung dari Allah untuk aku dan Kanda. He has blessed us with a wonderful 8 years by being our son and I wish for hundreds more. Although he will grow up and be father and later a grand father, he will always be my baby boy, whom I adore and love every second in my entire being. I am not a good mother, I scream, I yelled, I pinched a lot but he is the greatest son any mother could have. I can scold him all I want, but he will hold no grudges against me but instead he will hugged me with tears streaming down his chubby cheeks, asking for forgiveness. He is smart as he knows that will surely melt me and brought me to my senses. I have all good wishes for him on his birthdays and my prayers will always be with him.He has a miracle pair of hands which creates artistic piece (on my wall when he was small). He has interest for food (making as well as consuming it) He loves it when I include him in my kitchen routine and love it even more when I asked for his help when doing wedding gift (hantaran) or prepare the table. Quite an artistic young man I pray for his sucess in his life and every road he takes.
Lastly , the only sister of mine will celebrate her birthday on January 29. She was brought up by my grand aunt since they were not blessed with children. My father was also brought up by them since his parents were so much in love they made a football team (with 3 more reserved players who died later) of children and just imagined 11 children is far from being handful, its a disaster. (rezeki dan rahmat Allah). I had 3 of my own and I am loosing it (my mind) bit by bit each day, 11??????. When I was born, my parents were transferred to a god forsaken place to teach.So my mom was helpless (read hopeless) with a cute baby (sempat lagik) and a toddler to match a new environment. So my grand aunt came up with a solution, she would help looking after my sister until the young couple settled down. However, when the time came, they were reluctant to let her go and they were so lonely without kids around. So my parents gave in. That was why I dont really have a close relationship with her. She was away most of the time, boarding school, college. Recently, since my grandparents passed away, we managed to start a new life together. I am learning to know her more. Mom tried even harder and I can sense that she is too trying to learn about us, me and mom. I love her with all my love and will love her come what may.
So, happy birthday my best pal Kak Mah, My dearest cousin Lyana Mauseth, My beloved Mama, My baby Amal and my lovely sister Kakak. I love u all and I thank Allah for all of U. May Allah bless u always.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Of Mawi's wedding cake

Dont get a wrong idea by the heading of this entry, its not about Mawi or his newly weded wife. They made a lovely couples though, so let them be.
I started this blog with one intention in mind, I need a medium to express my dispair, hatred or ill feelings to somebody or anybody whom I got the risk to meet everyday in my line of work.
Well, I might sound mentally ill for having so much hatred inside me, but the truth is ehem I am a nice person (although I can be very bitchy when I chose to be) so as a nice person (by force technically ) I must put on a smiling face in order to ensure prosperity to my boss. Its the rule of the thumb that if a boss is blessed with good business, employees will have their fair share of the good harvest, right. So I need to be nice to any person who is a potential wealth contributer to the office i.e client although I was dying inside with the urge to kill.
Maybe I am loosing my mind afterall, maybe its due to continous ceasarian section done on me, perhaps they have cut several important nerves which link to my brain or maybe I am the victim of global warming (????) or whatever, but I get annoyed pretty easily these days.
Dear readers, so please provide me with some diagnose with any possible brain disease that I might be suffering of, after reading this entry :-
Last 2 days, I was 'suppose' to have lunch with Kanda. Supposed here refer to an event which fails to serve its purpose lah. As I was waiting for my anticipated ABC zealeously, Kanda phone beeped, an sms. As he was reading it, he grinned and showed it to me.It was from one of his staff from other department. Let's name her PP (pompuan gedik) It reads :-
Salam. En ***, betulke nak sponsor kek untuk majlis kawen saya? Sy takut En *** main 2 je
Just imagined the look on my face, afterall I am the Queen of Emo uolzs, so do expect a criss crossed between maintain cun Erra Fazira style with a Gajah Naik Minyak expressionlah.
I asked him what its all about. According to him they were talking about Mawi's wedding cake over refreshment after a meeting last week. And PP was there helping to distribute some papers. She was 'so much anxious' talking about her wedding do tah bila tah and was so impressed with Mawi's cake. So Kanda pun jokingly said
Kanda : Pasal awak nak kek bentuk cadar ke tilam plak ke, nanti saya sponsor.....
And dont tell me clerks kat Government office are all so shallow that she really thought that Kanda was serious?? Ke she was prying for sympathy....Aku tak paham pompuan zaman sekarang.
So I took Kanda's phone and replied on his behalf
Bleh, boleh blah
And she even has a gutt to answer back
Cakap la betol2, sy serius ni
So kanda dah lost. Padan Muka dia. Gatal sangat.
Kanda : Manalah I tau dia ni bendul macam ni, aduss U lah settlekan. Jgn lebih2 sampai kasi malu I dah la.
Me???? #$%%@*&^
So I replied to her :- Takkan kek je kot, khemah pengantin, katering, tukang silat, tukang kipas mak andam awak tak nak ke?? Keta kuda? Helikopter???
Kanda : Ish u ni suke over, sinilah
He typed : Lawak je. Takkan la awak nak mintak kek macam Mawi gak kot
PP : Takde lah Encik. Tak payah lah besar sgt. Sy nak yang 3 tingkat kaler biru putih sebab tema saya biru
Nahh kau, punyalah tak malu anak sapa lah tu. Mind U, Kanda is not her immediate boss, but selalu dipinjamkan untuk buat kerja-kerja bodoh yang orang lain tak nak buat. I dont mind if the girl is his assistant ke apa kan. I heard dia pun menagih-nagih sponsor kat officer lain jugak without a stain of shame.
I told Kanda I rather keluarkan all my savings and donate to Palestinian Fund rather than to sponsor that pompuan gedik a wedding cake, by all means. I dare him to do that and prepare to be famous next day. Because he will surely be a front cover story in major newspapers should he do that. I will do something although I dont have anything yet in mind, but I will think of something.I always will.
And Kanda said I get over reacted and over sensitive on petty things. Pergi jahanam lah.
On my way back to the office, I sms PP , this time using my own phone. (sempat ambik nombor ok)
Me : Aii Dik , dah lari bajet ke beli baju pengantin sampai kek pun mintak sponsor
Yess I can be that scarcastic
PP : Tak lari pun. Kalau tak nak sponsor pun tak pe boleh beli sendiri
Me : Tulah yang terbaik sekali. Sendiri mau kawin sendiri beli k. Berbelanjalah ikut kemampuan. Artis je mintak sponsor ni kan
PP : Ok terima kaseh lah Encik ***.
Hahaha. Its true lah she is so shallow, she didnt even noticed that It was a different phone number. My number differ to Kanda's by one digit je.
Lantak lah, janji puas hati. One phrase best to describe me
Kite orang tak dak kacau orang tapi kalau orang kacau kiteorang, kiteorang makan orang.
Serves her right.....

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Hikayat Cik Kaya

First & Foremost Happy New Year uolzs......
After months of staying idle, i thot I need to update this blog before it turned to a fossil.
I have a good story to ponder upon on on this new year although it is not rather a significant one far from it being related. But anyway ada aku kisah????
I 've been struggling to write this story mory for quite some time, a few times, started but then I hesitated. Because, the truth is it was such an amazing story I dont know where to start dahhh.
Ok, here it goes. I have known this woman (let's name her Cik Kaya, not that she suka makan kaya or she is Tokey KAYA roti tu but it suits her la).
Once she was kinda close friend (but now 'closed' fren already). She was the person whom u will have to talk to first when u call my office before the call would be transfered to the person whom you want to speak to (after greenlight given) in a simpler word receptionist lah tuh. (matila dah terinnuendo identitinya secara terbuka but lagi skali ada aku kisahhh?)
Ok lah I am d ****** in the office but I am a nice person mind u, i can be close to anybody if I chose to e.g Abg Gani(san a/l ?????) the office cleaner or Mas Joko Soprianto the Pencuci keta kat blakang tuh, no hal.
Let me introduce u 2 d main character, people, she was in her late 30's, petite and muka pun boleh lah boleh jelah, takdelah gorgeous like Angelina Jolie or sipi-sipi macam Linda Ong pun jadilah kata orang tu kan.
But one thing about her, she is so perasan cantik & muda and menjadi dambaan semua male species yang ada di planet bumi dan mungkin Planet Marikh, Jupiter pun. She was once married but according to her for a short period of time for reasons maleh nak cite sebab I dont give a damn.
This Cik Kaya is addicted to MySpace, Imesh etc (excpt FB) segala yang ada ruangan sembang sawang tu, with one purpose ......apa laie cari jantan la. Kengkonon Cik Kak ni nak cari suami yang mithali. handsome kaya yang sepada dengan dirinya dan karier nya yang mencabar tuh (mencabar uolzs kerja angkat tipon taw sb kena list down tipu-tipuan yg boleh diguna pakai dan dikitar semula pada client2 puaka yang kau tak hengen nak layan kat telepon, so got to give her some credits la for covering us up kannn). Tetapi kan, sungguhla karat nye daya intelek pompuan tu kalau ko nak harapkan laki macam Dr Fadzli tu add ko kat MySpace and terus pinang ko kerana terlalu taksub ngan kejelitaan ko. Bukankah hanya species-species jantan lahanat je sume tuh. Ok lah Wardina tiu dapat suami yang soleh daripada Internet kan tapi tgk la medium jugak, kat mana kan.AND ......Wardina tu chantekkk ok ko????camTAIK...
So berbalik kepada cerita Cik Kaya tadi. Imej yang ditonjolkan adalah seorang gadis Melayu terakhir yang sentiasa dirundung malang, sopan santun, berbudi bahasa dan muslimah solehah. Sebab hanya beberapa ketul je manusia kat opis tu yang tau she was once married.Cik Kaya tu apa laie, mempropah la seantero dunia kononnya dia anak dara gitu, tetapi malam-malam bertukar -tukar. Hari Ahad Abg G, Senin Abg Mus, Jumaat Abg Ali macam tulah. Tetapi siang-siang keramat hidup.
Tup-tup Cik Kaya telah berkenalan dgn sesorang jejaka dari Singapura kekdahnya. (Ni keturunan Singapura dilanggar Todak kot, sebab tu bute mate). Berchenta lah Cik Kaya di alam maya. Bagai nak rak, sampai lupa nak buat kerja mengangkat telepon tu, gila bayang. Kiranya kalau tido pun jari buleh bergerak-gerak macam menaip la kata org. Wahhh gembira sungguh Cik Kaya bila mengetahui Sang Jejaka Singapura ni orang kaya, keturunan kerabat dari Brunei, business seantero dunia, anak Datuk plak. Mula lah Cik Kaya berangan nak jadi Azlinaz Mazhar Hakim ni Tuan Puan dan Nyonya. Sampailah ke peringkat koling-koling. Bila start je babak tipon2 ni bermula, bermulalah jugak babak cerita lawak gampang tahap tenuk merhoyan.
Yang selalu koling-koling Cik Kaya adalah 1. Adik jejaka itu, 2. Ibu jejaka itu 3.sepupu jejaka itu. Sungguh hairan bin ajaib jejaka itu tidak pernah bertalipon melainkan hanya bersms adanya.
The best part is, si bodoh tu percaya plak alasan -alasan hampeh tu. Kononnya maknya nak betul2 pastikan Cik Kaya ni ikhlas nak kawan ngan anak dia baru dia nak bagi berkawan betul2. Mak nye pun berchatting gak uolsz ngan bakal anak menantu...ha ha ha. Logik ???
Pastu nombor telepon yang dipakai tu No Maxis????? Singapura yea???.Bila ditanya katanya selalu turun M'sia. Aah. Selang beberapa bulan, si jejaka yang tak pernah bersuara menghantar sepupunya untuk bersua muka ngan Cik Kaya.
Semasa perjumpaan tuh sepupunya yang maha kaya tu , CEO sebuah travel agency pun datang bawak keta KENARI, ha ha, pakai baju kurung corak ubat nyamuk yang juai kat MYDIN 4 meter rm9.90 he he and pakai selipar seret ho ho. Nak terburai urat perut aku. Mana aku tau? Kenapa aku tau?? Sebab aku yang bawak dia jumpa pompuan tu ha ha ha Gelak untuk aku plak. Bukan apa, aku ni kan berjiwa Nancy Drew noks, so aku tak puas ati, I got to prove to the mangkok yang dia kena auta big time.
She brought what with her to be presented to the Cik Kaya?? 2 utas jam tangan berjenama satu Tissot and Gucci, 2 bouqet besar roses, 2 designer's label perfume (tak kosser aku nak ingat) and sebuah majalah Media Hiburan he he tu yang kelakar nak mampusss. Aku tak taw sampai sekarang I am puzzled to the connection of the Majalah and Cik Kaya. Mungkin indirectly he was telling that the magazine also belong to his bapak yalah sebab dia kan pewaris empayar perniagaan bapaknya yang ada kedai Honda, Kedai HandPhone, Hotels etc u name it u got it la orang kata.Habiss dont tell me hobi seorang CEO baca majalah hiburan. ??? Ko ingat anak bujang Donald Trump baca ke Vanity Fair??? Playboy adalah kot.
Dipendekkan cerita Cik Kaya was head over heels la I tell u. Degn bangga dan penuh propa mengayakan barangan berjenamanya tuh pada budak-budak kat opis tu yang nan ado. TETAPI malangnya, staff yang paling shallow IQ tu dia, buleh plak budak2 tu belek barang2 tuh and found out that everything ada label Jusco Mahkota Parade kekdahya bukan pun Takashima ka Vivo City ka apa kat Singapura nun. Dah the day before kan ke Si Jejaka dah propa di dalam sms yang dia dah letih bshopping untuk buah hatinya yang jelita lagi anggun tuh.The best part pun, warranty kad jam tu tulis la plak sales date nye tahun lepas ha ha ha......Tapi ada Cik Kaya peduli????Boley Jalan.Dia kan sengal.
Oppps lupa nak cakap yang gambar sang jejaka hanya ada sekeping je yang diahantar. Tak de lagi lah dua tiga belas macam ko berchenta dulu Lyana walaupun laki ko dok obersea jugak, jauh nun lagi laki hang dari jantan tu. Alah Singapura tuh batuk also can hear , so near.
Semenjak itu, mulalah si jejaka tu buat perancangan nak meminang Cik Kaya. Kononnya nak bagi hantaran RM30ribu Sing Dollar ok, meraung kau Ekin, Mawi bagi kau duit M'sia je. Uiihhh macam-macam lah lagi yang di propah kan untuk melaksanakn wedding yang meletop letop lah orang kata.
Maklumlah setelah dirisik oleh sepupunya tu, yang kita namakan dia Cik Momok, bahawa sungguh lah jelita Cik Kaya ni, sesuai menjadi menantu Sharipah Datin.Maka Sharipah Datin pun menghantar lagi sekali Cik Momok turun ke Malaysia untuk membeli sebuah rumah untuk Cik Kaya kerana mana kelesss bakal menantu orang ternama dok umah bujang yang hapak kan. So, pending membeli rumah tu, Cik kaya pun berpatah arang lah dengan kawan-kawan serumah yang dah kenal 13 tahun, tidur sebantal mimpi pun seepisod.Kalu dulu Cik Kaya tu kayap, nak beli meggi pun cari yang paling murah, beli beskut pun paling murah, spender pun paling murah, dulu pakai spender lebas, sekarang Levis kannn.Cik Momok pun tak tertahan azab melihat rumah bujang Cik Kaya, terus memaksa Cik Kaya menginap di Hotel 5 stars sampai dapat rumah untuk dibeli, kauu.
Sepanjang hidup bersama Cik Momok (harus tidak dilupa di mana gerangan si jejaka????hanya antar wakilnye) terus lah Cik Kaya dilimpahi dengan kemewahan, bak kata orang tu tidur shopping, makan shopping, mimpi pun shopping lah. Cik Kaya yang dulunya pakai bra Giant la ni dah kenal Wacoal ok.
Hand phone usah diperkatakan lagi lah tuan tuan puan puan, asal gaduh je baling ke dinding, esok dapat baru. Macam tulah.
Dipendekkan cerita yang dah panjang sampai jari aku kebas sebab aircond sejuk and sebelum jari aku terus jadi batu belah batu bertangkup, Cik Kaya telah duduk menyewa di sebuah rumah teres corner lot. Telah pun berumah tangga tetapi bukan dengan si jejaka tertapi dengan Cik Momok........
Persoalan-persoalan yang aku dah pening and aku nak mintak korang pulak tolong pikir ialah
1. Kat mana si jejaka??? Kenapa tak muncul2 sampai sekarang hanya bersms
2. Ap pekerjaan sebenar Cik Momok yang dikatakan warganegara Singapura, tetapi tak balik2 and asyik je ada kat umah tu
3. Kalau kaya sangat nape tak tukar2 keta, nape pakai Viva dari ari tuh??
4. Nape sume duit dia cash je takde guna plastik??
La ni, kat opis Cik Kaya jadi kera sumbang sebab sapa pun tak nak kawan dia sebab malas nak dengar . Dah la jadi pembohong hakiki sama je ngan si Momok. Baru ni kononnya nak bercuti kat Gold Coast tapi Cik Momok bawak borong baju sejuk kat Winter Apparels wuah ha ha ha aku nak mampus gelak. Last2 tak jadi.
Tulah korang ada ke sedara ke kawan-kawan ke yang pernah kena tipu tahap gaban macam tuh????Mungkin oleh orang yang sama??? ATAU korang penah ke kenal orang yang sesengal Cik Kaya tuhhhh???? Misteriiiiiiii.Ha ha haha (gelak setan)